Sunday, 6 September 2015

How are the Kids?

Yesterday I had a morning visit from my friend Shannon and spent the afternoon with Theo and the kids, and it was great. The kids scootered on the paths out back, we raced (I really thought my wheelchair was faster than it is), we ate from my giant bin of food in the fridge and just enjoyed the day. Everyone helped me do some of my physio homework and the kids got a kick out of how floppy I am (read: laughing hysterically). I wish home was closer and they could come more often, and not just for me. Their laughing, smiling faces bring happiness to others that are here. Children are therapeutic. My old neighbour in bed B says she will always remember the time she watched Oliver crawl right up into my bed and snuggle right in beside me, pure happiness.

Just before they left to get subs to eat in the car on the way home, Oliver said to me that I was lucky. "Oh, why is that?" His response, "You get to lay in bed all day." Which of course made me cry, and I feel awful about that. Awful. Because he was just being a nine year old boy. Then he wished I could trade places with him - which just made me feel sick because of course I imagined that it was him lying in this bed. To which I responded NO WAY. He doesn't get it - he's not there yet, and that is okay, because he is nine. In his mind, lying in bed all day would mean that he would be able to spend even more time memorizing his pokemon cards.

While we were racing, Ella asked me if being in an electric wheelchair was fun. And of course I can't just say yes to her. Instead I said, "if I didn't have to be in one, I probably would be." I don't know why I can't just think like a kid and not take everything so seriously. It's hard.

So "how are the kids" is a pretty common question these days. My response is that they are fine because I don't really know, and I think that they are. Ella understands, I think, but Oliver is not there yet. I am missing Ella's experimentation with make-up phase and Oliver's joy of having new back to school shoes. Things will be different when Mom comes home in a wheelchair, then we'll see how the kids are.
This was the location of the race - behind the dumpsters where are the old hosptial beds go to die.


  1. That is quite a race going on there. Who won? Maybe you should ask for a race-wheelchair so you can beat the kids next time. Thanks for sharing your heart with us once again. (praying for wisdome for you as you have to answer your kids questions) Love from the Vandervlies family.

  2. I love this photo of you :) will be visiting you very soon.

  3. Great photo! You are incredible! Love reading the blog and catching up on your life. Sending you light and love always. Xo

  4. They are! Therapeutic. I brought a baby to Huronview one Christmas and an older resident cried, saying she hadn't touched a baby in several years. This blog entry made me are so touchingly obtuse. Keep racing!!

  5. I love this picture! I know you and Theo are doing a wonderful job at making sure the kids are doing well. Just going out and racing with them is, I'm sure, helping them with seeing their mom in a wheelchair.

    Thank you for the visit! You looked fantastic. Your hard work, determination, and positive attitude is inspiring. :) xo

  6. Not sure if my original post went through but wanted to say thank you. Thank you for sharing your story, thank you for being honest, and thank you for being you. Your posts are a incredible mixture of bravery, reality, and optimism. Wishing you the fastest and best recovery possible. May you be home sooner than you think.